In a word.. AMAZING!

I am happy to report it has been a good weekend!  Friday night I hung out with G-Rama, and watched the Cubs.  It was not their best game, but I got to see a hottie on the mound so... It was great!  Saturday, I spent time relaxing, and watched the Cubs get a W.  Then it happened... I got the best news I could have asked for!  My boy made the play off roster!!  WOO HOO!! All the haters out there feel free to go to the back of the line.. your negativity will NOT be accepted!  Write it down; this is a name you all need to get used to:  SAMARDZIJA.  Mark it down folks, mark it down!  I am so happy for him I don't even know where to begin.  I know you all think I am insane, I just don't care!  He is amazing, from double A to the post season in one summer is AMAZING!  I don't care who you are or how much you want to complain it is still amazing!  He deserves a hug!  I am really good at giving them too!  Again, I did not say anything about letting go!  :-)    And just to let everyone know, samardzija-mania will NOT be ending anytime soon!  if you have a problem with this please feel free to change the channel.  

I said it before, and I'll say it one more time; this is my space to say what I want... I am not going to apologize for doing just that!  Tonight I was reminded how fun the simplest things can be.  Younger brothers are amazing!!!  Who knew buying fruit could be so hilarious!  Our parents failed to see the amusement, but he & I had a good time!  It is just nice to stop, and take in the beauty around you.  SO often we get so caught up in getting more, being more, and doing more.  All of those things are great, but it is no excuse not to realize how beautiful the sunset is, or the color of your special some one's eyes.  We have to find balance; yin, and yang.  Striving for a better tomorrow can't replace the amazing parts of today!  

That is my challenge for all of us today, take a moment, or two (they're short!) and just enjoy the sights, and sounds around  you.  Take a second to soak it up, and give thanks for being a part of it.  The journey of life may be a bumpy one at times, but it is worth it!  Take the time today to be a part of it, rather than simply get through it.  You never know what you've been missing!

Sleep tight everyone!  <3

Life Crashing into Dreams...

The last 24 hours have definitely Gotten the best of me.  It's the damnedest thing; we allow ourselves to dream, breathe, and grow only to have life crash in.  Leaving everything in shambles, letting the fear back in.  That's where I am right now.  I want {SO} much for myself, and my life... but reality is a bitch right now.  So, once again I am faced with a choice: the same one I've been facing all of my life.  Let fear, anger, and insecurity get the best of me, submersing me in blackness. Or pick myself up from the wreckage, and fight like hell!  Ever been there?  If so, what did you choose??  

Luckily I am a fighter.  Even when it hurts like hell I find the strength to get back up, and face another day.  Believe me, spending my life in a wheelchair is no picnic, but I know it could be worse.  **I didn't share that to get sympathy, I just want people to know I understand facing constant adversity in life.**  No matter how tough life gets there is always a reason to get back up...  sometimes we may not even know what the reason is, but I believe we will in time.  The point is when life turns everything upside down, and you feel you  have nothing left listen to the small voice inside of you.. find strength in who you are . {NEVER} be afraid to show the world just how great you are!  The fact is I believe we all possess greatness; not everyone finds the courage to let it shine.  Next time life crashes head on into your dreams leaving you bloodied and bruised stand up, brush your shoulders off, and shine!  You never know who might need to bask in your light.  

That's what this blog is all about: me being exactly who I am with no apologies.  Wouldn't it be amazing if we could all do that.  far too often we become what we believe people want us to be.  Whose life is this: ours, or theirs?  Not to get off on a whole other tangent, but maybe if we strived to be authentic, and love people authentically they to could be authentic.  Real love no fairytale, but us is something everyone deserves.  We all have the right to be loved for simply being who we are!  Why is that so hard for people to grasp?  Is It really that much easier to hate???  I'd much rather use my energy to love people, and help them do the same.  I don't care what anyone says; love CAN change the world!  In fact, it already has!  

On a side note tomorrow is Friday WOO HOO!  The week has gone really fast.  I will be hangin' out with G Rama watching the Cubs!  :D  It is sure to be a good time.  We love our Cubbies.  I of course will be praying for some hottness to grace the t.v. screen.  I am sorry but he is just yummy!  Yeah that's right, I said it!  I just want to give him a hug... hey, no one said anything about letting go!  :)  Like i said this is me; if you don't like it feel free to change the channel.  Life is way too short to not say what you mean, and I meant what I said.  If I ever get the extreme joy of meeting Jeff I plan to tell him just how amazing I think he is!  Right after I remember how to breathe.  LOL!  Of course, if/when that happens I will tell you all about it.  Stranger things have happened...

If our dreams were easily attainable we'd have nothing to work for... then we would never grow.  We were not meant to be stagnant, so dare to dream bigger.  As they say, **Shoot for the Moon; even if you miss you'll land among the stars.**

Ok, it is bed time for this crazy, dreaming, fighter.  Sweet dreams everyone!!  I hope I have some... :)

This is fun!!!

I had SO much fun with my first entry I thought I'd try it again.  :)  The Cubs did not do so hot tonight, but it's ok... Lou seemed to be testing out the bullpen tonight; I am still a little nervous but I don't think my boy is going back to the minors.  In the words of Minxie over at samardzijapaloosa; keep the good energy flowing Jeff's way.  :-)  Not trying to be a copy cat I just want to show my hottie some love!!  Yes, yes I know I am crazy, and that is just how I like it!  My friends will be the first to tell you I have been crazy since the day we met, and I will be crazy till the day I die.  Being normal is totally over rated.  

I just feel really giddy right now, and I am not sure why.  I've got to say it feels good to feel this good.  Life has been pretty heavy lately (I know I am not on that bus alone), it is nice to just feel alive.  Happy, focused, free to dream.  Change is hard, but ultimately it is necessary.  If we don't change we will never grow.  Guess you could say I am having a growth spurt!  Who knows, maybe I'll grow to be 6'0. LOL only in my mind!  Woo that makes me laugh.  

I am excited for what lies ahead.  It is scary, but i just know it is going to be amazing!  It is time for this girl to get back to being who she really is; not what other people say she needs to be.  My goal is Chicago, and allowing myself to live by the seat of my pants.  Sounds amazing to me!  Like I said in my post earlier it is way to short to sit in the bleachers.  This is one crazy girl who is gettin' in the game!  Look out world, here I come! 

Okay, that is enough fun for one day. I'll try to write tomorrow once I get back from mom's.  Keep a good thought that Jeff will pitch tomorrow night... SO HOTT!!!

On that note, sweet dreams everyone!!  <3

 

A Bend In the Road..

My very first blog... Exciting!

A phone call from a life long friend triggered an eruption of emotion today.  I guess that's what I get for burying it for the last 12 years. While I hate the pain it is good to know I am not numb, and I have not allowed myself to become hard like some other people I know.  Just a reminder to start living rather than existing.

Which leads me to the title of this entry: it truly describes my life right now.  So much has changed in the last month, and I feel I am at a bend, or fork in the road.  It is time for me to choose which way to go.  Do I continue on the safe route; never rocking the boat just coasting along.  Or do I dare to dream.  No actually the real question here is do I dare to LIVE. Others may find this both irrational and irresponsible; I really don't care.  The fact of the matter is it is far easier to "get through" life, who wants easy? I say go out guns blazing and be who you are!  NO REGRETS!  I have spent my whole life worrying about what others will think or say.  No more!  It is time to live it up!  Take some risks, get a little crazy.  This is not a dress rehearsal, what am I waiting for?!  In the words of my man Dave Matthews **Take these chances; place them in a box until a quieter time: lights down you up and die.**  We wait for things to be safer, or better, or easier.  Tomorrow is not promised so live it up today!

I lot of you reading this (if anyone actually does) might think I am just a stupid girl; if so feel free to stop reading now!  I am not trying to be a human cliche I just want to remind myself, and everyone else how quickly it can end.  James Dean said it best, **Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today.**

Okay, I think you get the point... but before I go we have to talk about one of the loves of my life: THE CUBS!  Hate on me all you want, but I have good feeling about this year!  For those of you saying **Cubs fans say that every year.** I have to words for you... DON'T HATE!  So what if Cubs fans say that every year; we are not fare weather fans... we stand by our team!  I BELIEVE, and no one is taking that away for me.  This is the year my grandma (who has been a Cub fan for over 60 years) has been waiting for...  It also helps that they have the hottest relief pitcher ever!  Say it with me now.. JEFF SAMARDZIJA!  Whew, when did it get so hot in here!  For those of you who have no idea who I am talking about please see the photo below, and check out http://samardzijapalooza.blogspot.com. 

Ok, the game is about to come on... maybe more later.  GO CUBS GO!!